My To-Don't List

I love lists. I love making them, I love crossing things off of them, I feel lost without a list to guide me. Am I a wee bit of a control freak? Yes, as a matter of fact I am. Do lists help me maintain the illusion that I am in control of my life? Yes, as a matter of fact they do.

I generally have multiple to-do lists going: one for the month, one for the week, one for the day. At night, when the house is quiet and Michael and I are tucked cozily in our bed (basically when Michael is trapped), I usually go through my to do list with him. I'm quite sure he doesn't find it as relaxing as I do, but I persist because I find it soothing. Usually, as I'm listing thrilling tasks like "return pants to Target" and "send out gas bill", I'll hear a sleepy voice say "But what is on your to-don't list?".

So, in honor of my husband and because I have the day off from both of my jobs (oh the luxury!), here is my to-don't list:

1. Club baby seals
2. Wash the dishes
3. Sell drugs to school children
4. Shower and change out of my pjs before 1pm
5. Wear horizontal stripes
6. Volunteer for the military
7. Vacuum
8. Prank call Michael at work
9. Post nude photos on the internet
10. Laundry
11. Sell all worldy goods, join cult and move into the compound
12. Paint toenails blue
13. Pick nose while driving
14. Yard work of any kind
15. Watch more than 2 informercials on tv

Yes, it is a long list, but I think it can be done.