The day after Thanksgiving: a time line

8:59am Wake up, reluctantly. Curse smallness of bladder.

9:01am Find the husband. Demand kisses and affection.

9:05am Settle into arm chair. Attempt to read lousy new book. Discuss with husband all the reasons the book is lousy. Try to figure out what the author is trying to describe when he says Robert Bly looks like "a leprechaun riding on a polar bear".

9:10am Breakfast: Diet Coke and stuffing, just as God intended.

9:15am-12:07pm Watch TV. Alternate between college football and TLC's What Not to Wear. Appreciate the fact that husband see the merit in TLC's fine day time programming options.

12:08pm Make vague promises to shower and get dressed. Soon. Yeah. Soon. Maybe at 12:30

12:30pm Lunch:Turkey and corn casserole, eaten in front of TV.

12:35pm Wrap self in blanket and set a new shower deadline. Promise to get out of pjs by 1:00pm

1:00pm Watch more TV

1:15pm Sexually harass husband. Pout when said husband refuses to take pants off and dance just to amuse me

1:30pm Say goodbye to husband who is going running. Admire his ambition. Watch more TV

2:00pm Check email, celebrity gossip blogs, read husband's blog (finally updated). Set new shower goal= 2:30pm

2:30pm Still on internet. Take break to have Diet Coke and Vanilla Wafers for snack. Mmm.

3:00pm Finally brush teeth. Congratulate self on this progress. Lay down and rest a little.

3:30pm Take shower. Admire self vigorously for making such progress.

4:24pm. Blog. Procrastinate on actually accomplishing anything today.